The High Road Leads to The Cliff

I try to take the high road in general, just as kind of a life philosophy. Because I have to live with my own actions, right? So if the cashier charges me for a proletariate everyday head of lettuce, and I've really got some sexy, more expensive arugula, I don't really go with the "Hey, their mistake!" kind of action. I usually point it out.

Now, lest you think I'm all smug about being morally superior, I will reassure you I am not. I used to lie with the best of them. But now, for some reason I've developed the most pointy, constant, present conscience in the universe. I feel guilt as a physical sensation, to the extent that I avoid situations that cause me to feel guilty. So I guess it's kind of like that drug they give alcoholics that makes them puke their guts out after a sip of wine.

Anyway, I have an ex-husband. The ex part is mainly because he was a weaver of lie-webs. He would lie easily and often, and usually about things of no consequence. And you know, we fought about it a lot. I'd be all, "Hey, that wasn't true!" and he'd be all "Well, it got us this. Stop being so anal." And then I'd just kind of let it go, trying to brush those types of things under the rug in order to maintain the level of respect I needed to feel for him.

But, readers, as it turns out, little lies are the gateway drug. They lead you into bigger and more important lies without too much trouble. In the case of my ex, it was a long and protracted affair that involved lying to me, himself, the person he was romancing, and, well, everyone. And our lives fell apart because of it. 

Me, I managed to get clear of the wreckage. I sometimes feel like I grabbed my little dudes and pulled them out with me as our lives collapsed around us. And then got to rebuild it all, even better than before. Kind of survivor-like, if that claim were not so incredibly overused that it has lost all meaning. 

My ex, on the other hand, may just never get much out of life, since he's still willing to weave. I think he might be one of those people doomed to repeat their mistakes. My main hope for him is that he can be the father that the boys need so much. And maybe, just maybe, figure out some stuff along the way. 

We'll see.